This is the best year for music quality wise that i've ever seen...there's so much great music coming at me from every corner this year! Let's hop right to it.
Album #1: Mew - No More Stories Are Told Today, I'm Sorry, They Washed Away. No More Stories, The World Is Grey, I'm Tired, Lets Wash Away
This album is as awesome as it's title is long. Simply put, this album is a beautiful piece of work, much too vast for my words to actually give it justice. It's a very happy album with beautiful and creative instrumentals, much like Sigur Ros but less icelandic and more dancy and full of very pretty and catchy riffs.
Comments/Complaints: Really, this album doesnt need alot of introspection because it's full of beautiful bassy, dancy riffs, and lots of creative beautiful sounding atmospher and very catchy awesome vocals.
Ranking: 9/10 because this album makes me smile and nod my head and hug my grandmother
Album #2: Keelhaul - Triumphant Return To Obscurity
Keelhaul is a very very heavy, very very awesome band. This album opens with an incredibly heavy, dillinger/converge with colin marston on bass vibe. Keelhaul play a very unique type of heavy music that has alot of converge meets dysrhythmia riffs on it. Basically put, these guys remind me alot of these arms are snakes, and other post metal bands with a rock n' roll aesthetic...but it's alot stranger than most of those bands and played with alot of anger and a hint of a southern rock attitude. Nevertheless, the riffage is absolutely amazing, especially the bass and the drums, the basslines are very heavy and the drums are very fast and technical, the guitar riffs have a very post metal sound to them. Basically Keelhaul manage to take about 2 different styles that i'm fond of and lump them in together to make them a big rock n' roll/post metal monster that will eat any puny planet that tries to get in the way...on the downside though...until the album grows on you...it gets old after about 5 or 6 songs.
Comments/Complaints: This album is a grower...it's hard to get into at first, but you know once you really give it a chance, you'll really really like it. But admittedly because it's got so many different directions it can possibly go in sometimes the songs wear a bit thin on the ears and you find yourself wondering "when is it going to be over?" which is not good.
My Ranking: I'm going to give this album an 8.5/10 because i respect how awesome it really is and the effort put behind this album...despite the fact that it does take a bit to really soak in
Album #3: Band Of Skulls - Baby Darling Doll Face Honey
The song death by diamonds and pearls off of this album gets played pretty regularly on the radio and that's how i discovered this band, i mention this because rarely do i hear something on the radio and think to myself "i have GOT to check this band out!". Needless to say, after checking this album out i'm very glad i did so...it's got a very bouncy, indie/blues-garage rock vibe to it. There are alot of awesome basslines on this album which make the dirty bluesy guitar riffs sound even better. This album is very radio friendly, in fact one of the songs even reminds me of franz ferdiand. The female singer in this band is actually pretty good too.
Comments/Complaints: Very radio friendly bouncy indie rock with a bit of a blues and garage rock type vibe to it.
Ranking: I give this album a 7/10 because it's a good solid album, but doesnt give itself a whole lot of reasons to be listened to for any song other than the radio single...which is in fact an amazing song.
Album #4: The Used - Artwork
Now, i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't used to be a huge fan of the used...their first album is just absolute genius! It's a fine piece of work and i'm still glad i bought it. But they let me down with the 2 albums after that, i mean they had some pretty good singles, but the albums themselves were kind of boring, however, i'll give them credit for having a distinctly distant style on each album which is good. On this album i have to say i'm pretty impressed with it, i mean it has that same vibe they've had over the years but with a sound that's very catchy, but also incredibly heavy. Dare i say, that this album is heavier than their first one which got them on ozzfest that year. There are breakdowns located on this album, and a ton of pent up anger but not as much of the lame annoying pop crap so heavily prevalent in their last 2 albums. I can certainly find the merit in listening to this album more than once, it's heavy, catchy, and has a familiar sound, it's also got a very anthemic vibe to it. I think that the used have finally put out an album to satisfy the people that have been with them since 2002 and that's a pretty good thing.
Comments/Complaints: If you're a fan of the band, or even if you just liked their first album, you'll dig this album alot because it's got a familiar sound, but it's slightly less radio, and more like a good album to listen to in the summer time while on a road trip.
My Ranking: I give it a 7.5/10 the 7 is because it's managed to rise above mediocrity but didn't land among the ranks of "really awesome, solid albums" but the .5 is to show that it's close to that status.
Album #5: Modest Mouse - No One's First And You're Next
Oh man, Isaac Brock truly is one of his generation's best songwriters. This album has all of the things that made me love modest mouse when i first heard the song float on on vh1 one day, but it also has all of the elements that made people fall in love with the lonesome crowded west and the rest of their entire back catalog. Songs like Satellite Skin have that familiar modest mouse stomp and lots of isaac brock's signature vocal hooks...but this album also has some incredible guitar work. Johnny Marr and Isaac Brock have teamed up to unleash a hellacious barrage of awesome guitar riffs written in a catchy, but non-commercial vibe. You can tell they weren't trying to capitalize on their huge status and sell more records with this album, this one is most definitely just for their own enjoyment as well as their rabid fanbase. There will be elitists who say "i hate them now because they are commercial and gay" but disregard those people because this album contains nothing but awesome songs written with great artistic intent and lots of catchiness to make itself very much worth listening to next to the rest of their discography.
Comments/Complaints: Touche' Mr. Brock and Mr. Marr and the rest of Modest Mouse, because this album rules alot.
My Ranking: I'm givin this one a 9 because a 10 would be a bit too much praise..however the album definitely rules and has alot more redeeming qualities than the last 2 albums.
Album #6: Spinnerette - Spinnerette
This album has been getting a ton of playtime in my cd player, and for good reason! It's awesome! It seems that not only was Brody Dalle impregnated with Josh Homme's child, she was also impregnated with his musical ability because on the new album, it sounds very much like queens of the stone age at times. It's got a real awesome, bouncy vibe to it, but also a hint of sexiness. I find it weird that she used to make annoying punk rock when she was married to tim armstrong but now that JoHo is in the mix she's making sweet ass dance rock! There are of course a few songs on this album that fall short of the mark of excellence...but most of those are post track 9...everything from tracks 1-9 is AWESOME!
Comments/Complaints: a sweet dance rock album by brody dalle that shows that the new qotsa album will be awesome, because if momma is feelin sexy and dancy...everyone is feelin sexy and dancy!
My Ranking: This one will get a 9/10 because of how rapidly increasing my enjoyment of this album is everytime i hear it.
Album #7: Sweethead - The Great Disruptors
This is an ep put out by Troy Van Leeuwen's new project Sweethead...which is him and some random people...it's very qotsa in nature, which is cool...i mean it's dancy, and sexy...but really it's just kind of like qotsa but without all the awesome stuff contributed by everyone else...Troy Van Leeuwen is kind of like a good tight end in the nfl though...sure, he's awesome...but if he doesnt have a good quarterback to throw to him or at least one other good receiver and/or a good running back to draw attention away from him then he's kind of useless. By that i mean...the guy's a great guitarist and stuff...but without other really good musicians around him like JoHo and Dean Fertita on guitar and Mikey Shoes on bass, and The Sexy Mexi on drums he just kind of comes off as a little bland you know?
Comments/Complaints: Instead of putting this out, troy should have probably just saved these riffs for a new qotsa album instead of pouring them out into a generic dance rock album that will fall to the bottom of his discog quality wise
My Ranking is a 6.5/10 really...i think there's alot of potential here...but he probably should have just used that on the new qotsa record
Album #8: Municipal Waste - Massive Aggressive
Let's see, this is a tricky review because...their music has been done to death before. So lets just say...this album is really really fast awesome thrash metal with a very dri intensity...it's really gnarly thrash that would be a great soundtrack for a night with friends a few 100 beers and a beer bong. This band is thrash metal for the kids that listen to deathcore and mallcore who are too cool for metallica and slayer and anthrax and sepultura and megadeth but like to thrash
Comments/Complaints: Simply put...this album is just awesome, gnarly, party thrash with a familiar vibe...but it won't have you throwing reign in blood away yet...
Ranking: I'll give it a 7/10 because though it's generic...it's really talented punk thrash and i like it...but i know there's plenty out there better
Album #9: Cave In - Planets Of Old Ep
Man, Cave In is such a great band with so many different sounds and possibilities...their newest ep actually showcases 4 completely different Cave In sounds basically.
Track 1: Starts out with a very isisy intro then comes in with a heavy as hell bassline and the vocals are very voivod in nature and full of super super heavy riffs, this song is very similar to old isis/old cave in...which as i'm sure you can tell...is awesome.
Track 2: Starts out with a riff that reminds me of a dropkick murphys song but it sounds really cool...the vocals come in still reminding me of voivod while some really cool riffs dance in and out over really cool punk rock type drumming.
Track 3: Starts out running at full speed! Very punk rock as hell! The drums are really really fast, the vocals are reminiscent of nick oliveri and has a really sweet bassline stomping around on it over some creative post-punk/hardcore riffage, the breaks where the guitars and screaming stop and it's just double bass kicks and that awesome bassline with guitars kind of peppering a bit of noise in and out is SO AWESOME!
Track 4: Starts out with more voivodian vocals and lots more punk rock drumming, but this song has a different vibe...more like newer cave in...but less poppy. But still very punk rock and very catchy that chorus "air escapes our lungs every day we won't lie, we don't say, air escapes our lungs every day" with the guitar riff matching the rhythm of the vocals...it's just awesome and then the slow sludgy breakdown part with the same rhythm is just awesome.
Comments/Complaints: This album shows a renewed vigor by these guys. The album is very very heavy, and very very very punk rock, but the vocals remind me alot of voivod...which isn't a bad thing...they just have kind of a weird robotic tone to them which is cool
Ranking: I'll give this a 9.5/10 if it were longer and kept with the same vibe this would definitely be a 10/10 no question. This album rules alot!
Album #10: He Is Legend - It Hates You
Wow, so this one came from way out in left field...
First of all i'd like to say that i absolutely loved loved loved i am hollywood when it first came out.
Second of all, i'd like to say that my heart broke the day i heard "suck out the poison" that is one of the worst excuses for an album i've ever heard...i literally listened to the beginning of the first song on that album and then immediately hit delete.
With that said, this album absolutely rules. It has all of the elements of I Am Hollywood that made that album excellent, creative riffs, excellent melodic vocals, catchy riffs and vocal hooks and whatnot, however, the basslines are really good, and it has a very Faith No More vibe at times. There's a few breakdowns here and there...but in a tasteful way. This album is really catchy, really heavy, and very very rockin. There actually isn't 1 bad song on this album which is pretty cool..but i just don't understand how they did a complete genre/sound/fashion overhaul and then decided to jump right back into their old sound and act like suck out the poison didn't even happen...which is cool...but you know...if you're going to sink the ship you should at least go down with it...not jump into a lifeboat and go back to your old ship that was really awesome.
Comments/Complaints: This album is incredibly surprising, heavy, awesome, rock n' rolling, non crappy.
Ranking: This puppy gets a definite 9/10 because it's really really good...you know..if you liked i am hollywood you'll think that anyways.
Wednesday, July 22, 2009
Sunday, July 19, 2009
CALSH OF THE TITANS!: Hair Metal Vs. Screamo Crunk
Any time you turn on a documentary about heavy metal on vh1, it seems most of it focuses on the hair metal aspect of the genre, which...though it is very unfair to heavy metal to focus on the most embarrassing/ridiculous aspect of it, it did bring a little more light to the genre that helped bring focus to the better bands of the genre like Metallica, Slayer, Exodus, Megadeth, and whatnot.
Any time you walk into a mall or a high school campus the first thing you notice is a very disturbing amount of children wearing brightly colored t-shirts, brightly colored and very skinny jeans, old school nike's in various bright, neon colors, and very odd hair in various colors, as well as brightly colored sunglasses. At first sight one might think (maybe the kid's truly aren't alright) but then when you examine the looks of the bands on most of their ipod's one quickly realizes that not only are they dressing ridiculously, but they are inspired by musicians who dress equally as ridiculous.
I can imagine in the 80's what it was like to work at a mall and see teenagers walking around in spandex with a ripped poison shirt and incredibly tall poofy hair and think "what a douche" much like today when you see a kid in a light blue devil wears prada shirt with pink kanye west glasses, purple skinny jeans, light blue, neon yellow, neon pink, and neon green, high-top nikes and numerous brightly colored spiked belts.
With that being said...i have always found it hilarious the similarities between the 80's hair metal scene where poison, motley crue, poofy hair, and leather and spandex reigned supreme, and the 21st century Screamo-Crunk explosion of underage kids listening to music that mixes hip hop and screamo singing about "gettin' beeotches" and "par-taying down" and "gettin' crunk".
So join me while i compare/contrast the ridiculousness of 2 of the most retarded sub-genres in music history
At the heart of every good musical movement...other than the music is of course the fashion. People see these bands on mtv and are awe-struck how...different they look...so what better way to really feel the music you're heroes play...then by DRESSING LIKE THEM! In fact, in genre's like hair metal and screamo-crunk, really the music isn't that important to people...it's all about looking cool and whatnot so of course people are going to dress like their favorite bands if it gets them laid...or at least...lots of attention.
First lets take a look at the fashion of your typical hair metal band that...a fashion that was really the main focus of hair metal, which shows why the music was so terrible...because you don't have to be talented to look cool and get signed.
First of all, the dude on the right...gotta love that hair...the guy in the center has the sweet studded leather clothing, and the long poofy blonde hair.
The focal point of this look is the leather, and studs, and the hair...which, though it may look ridiculous, i'm sure they got more poon than i could ever dream of just based on this look.
Next...let's take a look a band i'm sure you'll recognize.
Really this one needs no commentary because it pretty much speaks for itself. Poison were by far the most retarded of the hair metal movement, of course they also sold retarded amounts of albums.
This band also pretty much speaks for itself.
Motley Crue were by far my favorite hair metal band...and the only one that really mattered.
Oh, and who could forget...the world's finest christian hair metal band...
Gotta love the yellow and black attack
Of course not every hair metal era band was going for the over the top retarded look...but still achieved it anyways.
Example A:
You can't help but appreciate how Whitnesnake are trying to look cool...but also manly...i think they sort of failed at both of those really...thank god they wrote good songs!
Example B:
Faster Pussycat, aren't as talented as whitesnake, and actually they looked a bit stupider as well.
As far as screamo crunk goes...the fans are just as ridiculous as the artists so lets focus a bit on the people that listen to screamo crunk.
Most people that listen to the type of music that mixes rap, screamo, and techno aren't exactly normal...and neither is their fashion...
Typically most fans of this type of music are 12-16 year old girls with either parents who hate them and don't pay attention to them...or parents who spoil them and let them dress how they want so they don't hate them...much like the following enterprising young ladies...
Of course...this is my favorite picture of them all.
Of course boys that listen to this type of music also dress the part...
need i say more?
Now, of course in the screamo-crunk genre the artists have fashion equally as deplorable as their fans...however i'm not going to focus on that right now because you'll see plenty of that on display in a minute.
NOW...
the best part of these genres are the music videos where you actually get to see the artists spill their personality and ridiculousness out into your living room.
First...let's take a look at the hair metal videos, which are all quite humorous...mostly because they came right around the time when music videos were first being made, so this genre was the first to really reveal itself and it's style through music videos.
*some videos i can't embed, but are totally worth clicking the link to watch*
Motley Crue - Girls Girls Girls
Whitesnake - Here I Go Again
Warrant - Cherry Pie
Slaughter - Up All Night
Of course, i actually enjoy most of those songs...but the videos are quite ubiquitous...but if that's what you like than you're in for a treat...
Now, i present to you a screamo crunk videography
First, i present to you...the band that put screamo-crunk on the map
Hollywood Undead - Everywhere I Go
Hollywood Undead, are kind of the Led Zeppelin, of screamo-crunk, they are the biggest selling act in a genre that is A: pointless, and B: ever growing in popularity.
Next, is the group millionaires...i randomly stumbled across them on youtube one night and my brain hasn't been the same since...
Millionaires - Alcohol
Yes...that's 3 young ladies rapping about sex, drugs, and alcohol...
Next is Brokencyde...a band beloved by 12-16 year olds everywhere who are by far the most ridiculous and retarded of the entire genre
If you managed to make it all the way through that video without vomiting then i applaud you...or abhore you.
Now...for the really good one...i present to you...
3Oh!3 is becoming increasingly huge, and i sell at least 1 cd by them every day at work...mostly it's parents that have to buy it for their 16 year old because they don't love them or their taste in music.
And just for the hell of it i want to post a couple of other random videos that i find entertaining like this wonderful fan created video for a song by Dot Dot Curve
Also, who could forget about Jeffree Star...the cross dressing gay man with pink hair that makes money singing snotty dance pop songs and schmoozing with disney stars...and let's not forget that this abomination is also doing warped tour this year along with alot of the other groups mentioned in this section (not the hair metal bands of course)
haha....
I think when you really break the 2 genre's down...it's horribly apparent that screamo-crunk is much less significant to the musical landscape than hair metal, although both come with mind-numbingly terrible repercussions...like most of the old hair metal fans who now still go see all those bands live and have lost most of their brain cells from that decade but not their gang of unwanted children and "kix f*ckin rules!" and "twisted sister 4 ever!" tattoos...but that's much better than the consequences that will come from a generation of youth growing up on screamo-crunk which will inspire them to become drug-addicted, alcoholic, brightly colored, homosexual wiggers with Hollywood Undead and Brokencyde tattoos
Any time you walk into a mall or a high school campus the first thing you notice is a very disturbing amount of children wearing brightly colored t-shirts, brightly colored and very skinny jeans, old school nike's in various bright, neon colors, and very odd hair in various colors, as well as brightly colored sunglasses. At first sight one might think (maybe the kid's truly aren't alright) but then when you examine the looks of the bands on most of their ipod's one quickly realizes that not only are they dressing ridiculously, but they are inspired by musicians who dress equally as ridiculous.
I can imagine in the 80's what it was like to work at a mall and see teenagers walking around in spandex with a ripped poison shirt and incredibly tall poofy hair and think "what a douche" much like today when you see a kid in a light blue devil wears prada shirt with pink kanye west glasses, purple skinny jeans, light blue, neon yellow, neon pink, and neon green, high-top nikes and numerous brightly colored spiked belts.
With that being said...i have always found it hilarious the similarities between the 80's hair metal scene where poison, motley crue, poofy hair, and leather and spandex reigned supreme, and the 21st century Screamo-Crunk explosion of underage kids listening to music that mixes hip hop and screamo singing about "gettin' beeotches" and "par-taying down" and "gettin' crunk".
So join me while i compare/contrast the ridiculousness of 2 of the most retarded sub-genres in music history
At the heart of every good musical movement...other than the music is of course the fashion. People see these bands on mtv and are awe-struck how...different they look...so what better way to really feel the music you're heroes play...then by DRESSING LIKE THEM! In fact, in genre's like hair metal and screamo-crunk, really the music isn't that important to people...it's all about looking cool and whatnot so of course people are going to dress like their favorite bands if it gets them laid...or at least...lots of attention.
First lets take a look at the fashion of your typical hair metal band that...a fashion that was really the main focus of hair metal, which shows why the music was so terrible...because you don't have to be talented to look cool and get signed.
First of all, the dude on the right...gotta love that hair...the guy in the center has the sweet studded leather clothing, and the long poofy blonde hair.
The focal point of this look is the leather, and studs, and the hair...which, though it may look ridiculous, i'm sure they got more poon than i could ever dream of just based on this look.
Next...let's take a look a band i'm sure you'll recognize.
Really this one needs no commentary because it pretty much speaks for itself. Poison were by far the most retarded of the hair metal movement, of course they also sold retarded amounts of albums.
This band also pretty much speaks for itself.
Motley Crue were by far my favorite hair metal band...and the only one that really mattered.
Oh, and who could forget...the world's finest christian hair metal band...
Gotta love the yellow and black attack
Of course not every hair metal era band was going for the over the top retarded look...but still achieved it anyways.
Example A:
You can't help but appreciate how Whitnesnake are trying to look cool...but also manly...i think they sort of failed at both of those really...thank god they wrote good songs!
Example B:
Faster Pussycat, aren't as talented as whitesnake, and actually they looked a bit stupider as well.
As far as screamo crunk goes...the fans are just as ridiculous as the artists so lets focus a bit on the people that listen to screamo crunk.
Most people that listen to the type of music that mixes rap, screamo, and techno aren't exactly normal...and neither is their fashion...
Typically most fans of this type of music are 12-16 year old girls with either parents who hate them and don't pay attention to them...or parents who spoil them and let them dress how they want so they don't hate them...much like the following enterprising young ladies...
Of course...this is my favorite picture of them all.
Of course boys that listen to this type of music also dress the part...
need i say more?
Now, of course in the screamo-crunk genre the artists have fashion equally as deplorable as their fans...however i'm not going to focus on that right now because you'll see plenty of that on display in a minute.
NOW...
the best part of these genres are the music videos where you actually get to see the artists spill their personality and ridiculousness out into your living room.
First...let's take a look at the hair metal videos, which are all quite humorous...mostly because they came right around the time when music videos were first being made, so this genre was the first to really reveal itself and it's style through music videos.
*some videos i can't embed, but are totally worth clicking the link to watch*
Motley Crue - Girls Girls Girls
Whitesnake - Here I Go Again
Warrant - Cherry Pie
Slaughter - Up All Night
Of course, i actually enjoy most of those songs...but the videos are quite ubiquitous...but if that's what you like than you're in for a treat...
Now, i present to you a screamo crunk videography
First, i present to you...the band that put screamo-crunk on the map
Hollywood Undead - Everywhere I Go
Hollywood Undead, are kind of the Led Zeppelin, of screamo-crunk, they are the biggest selling act in a genre that is A: pointless, and B: ever growing in popularity.
Next, is the group millionaires...i randomly stumbled across them on youtube one night and my brain hasn't been the same since...
Millionaires - Alcohol
Yes...that's 3 young ladies rapping about sex, drugs, and alcohol...
Next is Brokencyde...a band beloved by 12-16 year olds everywhere who are by far the most ridiculous and retarded of the entire genre
If you managed to make it all the way through that video without vomiting then i applaud you...or abhore you.
Now...for the really good one...i present to you...
3Oh!3 is becoming increasingly huge, and i sell at least 1 cd by them every day at work...mostly it's parents that have to buy it for their 16 year old because they don't love them or their taste in music.
And just for the hell of it i want to post a couple of other random videos that i find entertaining like this wonderful fan created video for a song by Dot Dot Curve
Also, who could forget about Jeffree Star...the cross dressing gay man with pink hair that makes money singing snotty dance pop songs and schmoozing with disney stars...and let's not forget that this abomination is also doing warped tour this year along with alot of the other groups mentioned in this section (not the hair metal bands of course)
haha....
I think when you really break the 2 genre's down...it's horribly apparent that screamo-crunk is much less significant to the musical landscape than hair metal, although both come with mind-numbingly terrible repercussions...like most of the old hair metal fans who now still go see all those bands live and have lost most of their brain cells from that decade but not their gang of unwanted children and "kix f*ckin rules!" and "twisted sister 4 ever!" tattoos...but that's much better than the consequences that will come from a generation of youth growing up on screamo-crunk which will inspire them to become drug-addicted, alcoholic, brightly colored, homosexual wiggers with Hollywood Undead and Brokencyde tattoos
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Low Fidelity 7-19-09
Today started out great laying next to amber.
From there it was just really meh. Upon getting to work i realized today was going to be incredibly random, and i was correct!
Really, i can't remember any major details except for the usuals, people that ask REALLY stupid questions, LOTS AND LOTS of michael jackson sales.
King Kong Bundy came in and bought some porn...as per usual he bought the most porn of the day. Every time this guy comes in he buys between 2-6 movies and i've seen him at least 10 times...so by my calculations this guy probably has a HUGE collection of porn...and also i would imagine his house is a VERY VERY uncomfortable place to be in...
I decided to sell back a few of my cd's that i didn't want and i ended up getting $13 for em which was pretty cool! I then used that to buy the new Spinnerette album. Brody Dalle is a great musician...and the distillers weren't too bad...but you can tell since leaving tim armstrong for josh homme...she's gotten much better influences! I mean sure Tim Armstrong writes good songs...but he's too nichey...he's mostly a punk guy with a weird hip hop side project...but JoHo...well JoHo is a different creature entirely, the man has more musical talent in one bead of sweat than most people could EVER hope to have...and he's done albums with 3 bands that revolutionized their genre's. Kyuss changed the scope of all things heavy forever. Qotsa is the best living rock n' roll band on the planet. Eodm took pop rock and made it sexy. Now, his influence on his wife's music makes Spinnerette head and shoulders above the distillers.
I think what made me want to enjoy the Spinnerette cd is listening to alot of The Dead Weather at work...so far i've had 3 people tell me they hate this cd...but those people can suck it (well...1 of them can anyways) that album is absolutely incredibly awesome. It's got all the awesome dirty rock n' roll sounds that make my pants tighter, plus it's got alot of catchiness and replayability. And after all, isn't replayability EVERYTHING in the music industry?
I was flipping through the channels aimlessly tonight when i happened upon a documentary about steely dan's upcoming Rent Party tour that they are embarking upon and after watching footage of them rehearsing and discussing the tour and discussing life and their music it made me want to kick myself for not being able to see this tour...hehe actually i'm kidding, for, my ever so egregious (whatever that word means) father has made it possible for us to go see Steely Dan on their Rent Party '09 tour in Memphis the day before i depart for Florida, and pure, sweet vacation time away from the monroe hole for a week or so. It's going to be so incredibly awesome getting to revisit my favorite city and hopefully a future residence of mine in Memphis, Tn and i'll get to see a band i've been listening to since i was in my mothers womb. Then the next day drive down to Jackson and gtfo. Color me excited as hell.
This Spinnerette cd rules. Like, it's dancy and stuff, but not in the gay dancy way, but in the..."shake your butt uncontrollably and hump everything in the room" kind of way. But really, when you're the baby mama of JoHo...i don't think he would let her put out anything that sucks...but that makes me want to listen to the possible musical projects of JoHo's other serious lovers...i wonder what his gf at the time of his stint in Kyuss wrote...actually he probably spent so much time on the road and various drugs that he was mainly a groupie guy...and if my band invented a really awesome genre and got to tour with Metallica on the black album tour i'd gather up all the groupies i could too because i'd deserve it.
Metallica.
Man, that name just feels good to say...err...type...well...say it aloud with me as i type this...M-UH-TAL-ICK-UH METALLICA!
...best band ever n' whatnot
mr monkeyhead...bye
From there it was just really meh. Upon getting to work i realized today was going to be incredibly random, and i was correct!
Really, i can't remember any major details except for the usuals, people that ask REALLY stupid questions, LOTS AND LOTS of michael jackson sales.
King Kong Bundy came in and bought some porn...as per usual he bought the most porn of the day. Every time this guy comes in he buys between 2-6 movies and i've seen him at least 10 times...so by my calculations this guy probably has a HUGE collection of porn...and also i would imagine his house is a VERY VERY uncomfortable place to be in...
I decided to sell back a few of my cd's that i didn't want and i ended up getting $13 for em which was pretty cool! I then used that to buy the new Spinnerette album. Brody Dalle is a great musician...and the distillers weren't too bad...but you can tell since leaving tim armstrong for josh homme...she's gotten much better influences! I mean sure Tim Armstrong writes good songs...but he's too nichey...he's mostly a punk guy with a weird hip hop side project...but JoHo...well JoHo is a different creature entirely, the man has more musical talent in one bead of sweat than most people could EVER hope to have...and he's done albums with 3 bands that revolutionized their genre's. Kyuss changed the scope of all things heavy forever. Qotsa is the best living rock n' roll band on the planet. Eodm took pop rock and made it sexy. Now, his influence on his wife's music makes Spinnerette head and shoulders above the distillers.
I think what made me want to enjoy the Spinnerette cd is listening to alot of The Dead Weather at work...so far i've had 3 people tell me they hate this cd...but those people can suck it (well...1 of them can anyways) that album is absolutely incredibly awesome. It's got all the awesome dirty rock n' roll sounds that make my pants tighter, plus it's got alot of catchiness and replayability. And after all, isn't replayability EVERYTHING in the music industry?
I was flipping through the channels aimlessly tonight when i happened upon a documentary about steely dan's upcoming Rent Party tour that they are embarking upon and after watching footage of them rehearsing and discussing the tour and discussing life and their music it made me want to kick myself for not being able to see this tour...hehe actually i'm kidding, for, my ever so egregious (whatever that word means) father has made it possible for us to go see Steely Dan on their Rent Party '09 tour in Memphis the day before i depart for Florida, and pure, sweet vacation time away from the monroe hole for a week or so. It's going to be so incredibly awesome getting to revisit my favorite city and hopefully a future residence of mine in Memphis, Tn and i'll get to see a band i've been listening to since i was in my mothers womb. Then the next day drive down to Jackson and gtfo. Color me excited as hell.
This Spinnerette cd rules. Like, it's dancy and stuff, but not in the gay dancy way, but in the..."shake your butt uncontrollably and hump everything in the room" kind of way. But really, when you're the baby mama of JoHo...i don't think he would let her put out anything that sucks...but that makes me want to listen to the possible musical projects of JoHo's other serious lovers...i wonder what his gf at the time of his stint in Kyuss wrote...actually he probably spent so much time on the road and various drugs that he was mainly a groupie guy...and if my band invented a really awesome genre and got to tour with Metallica on the black album tour i'd gather up all the groupies i could too because i'd deserve it.
Metallica.
Man, that name just feels good to say...err...type...well...say it aloud with me as i type this...M-UH-TAL-ICK-UH METALLICA!
...best band ever n' whatnot
mr monkeyhead...bye
Friday, July 17, 2009
Low Fidelity 7-17-09
So after a very strange wednesday that included hanging out with dad in shreveport and eating a tasty backyard burger then later hanging out with amber at applebees and then being scolded for agreeing to go there with her i then went home with the gnarliest headache ever that at one point hurt so bad i felt the need to vomit but fought it off.
Today wasn't as bad except i knew i was going to have to go to work for the first time since saturday which is always a very difficult transition to make, but once i actually got to work and worked with mike, it reminded me how comfortable i am at that place and how much i actually hate being away from it.
Today at work was great, a low amount of customers, very few stupid questions, alot of nice people, noone too retarded. A few decent purchases made, and getting to listen to The Dead Weather for a few hours!
Sure, my paycheck sucked balls, but soon my hours will be back to normal but i'll be getting paid more thanks to a raise in minimum wage from $6.50 $7.25 or something like that, which is kind of dumb i think, given today's economic situation, but totally good for people that work in crappy mall's like me, this will just be more incentive to go to work now, as if having a job i don't hate, and getting paid to listen to, sell, and talk about music and movies all day, plus getting discounts, and early stuff, and free stuff wasn't enough.
I'm gonna chalk today up in the win column, also, i just posted this big review column with 8 albums in it and BOOM! just after i finished it i found new albums by mew, modest mouse, keelhaul, band of skulls, and the used all ready for me to listen to and write my thoughts on.
I'm stoked.
I'll leave you with a tweet i posted today after a particularly close call with a red mustang on my way to work
"Note to my guardian angel: keep up the good work!"
Today wasn't as bad except i knew i was going to have to go to work for the first time since saturday which is always a very difficult transition to make, but once i actually got to work and worked with mike, it reminded me how comfortable i am at that place and how much i actually hate being away from it.
Today at work was great, a low amount of customers, very few stupid questions, alot of nice people, noone too retarded. A few decent purchases made, and getting to listen to The Dead Weather for a few hours!
Sure, my paycheck sucked balls, but soon my hours will be back to normal but i'll be getting paid more thanks to a raise in minimum wage from $6.50 $7.25 or something like that, which is kind of dumb i think, given today's economic situation, but totally good for people that work in crappy mall's like me, this will just be more incentive to go to work now, as if having a job i don't hate, and getting paid to listen to, sell, and talk about music and movies all day, plus getting discounts, and early stuff, and free stuff wasn't enough.
I'm gonna chalk today up in the win column, also, i just posted this big review column with 8 albums in it and BOOM! just after i finished it i found new albums by mew, modest mouse, keelhaul, band of skulls, and the used all ready for me to listen to and write my thoughts on.
I'm stoked.
I'll leave you with a tweet i posted today after a particularly close call with a red mustang on my way to work
"Note to my guardian angel: keep up the good work!"
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Mini Music Reviews (Staying ahead of the times)
So i'm getting caught up on some albums that have come out recently or will be coming out soon, (or in kamchatka's case came out in march, but i just got ahold of) and though there is nothing majorly awesome in the list there are some pretty solid albums worthy of listening to at least once all the way through, and nothing that made me want to delete it from my zune asap.
Album #1: Our Lady Peace - Burn Burn
Huh? This band is still making music? I mean, sure...Clumsy is one of the best alt-rock albums of the 90's and happiness... and gravity were pretty good albums...but do these guys really need to keep making music? And i don't mean that negatively...but when every one of your albums since clumsy has sounded almost exactly the same and you couldnt tell one song from the next if you put their discography on shuffle...they still aren't a bad band...i mean sure all their songs sound the same...but it's not a bad sound. Really, i don't want to knock this album, and i'm sure i'll like it more after a few more listens like i did with gravity, but after their last album flopped wouldn't you think these guys would give it up and move on to something else?
Comments/Complaints: It's certainly not a bad album, although, it sounds like every other album they've done since clumsy.
My Ranking: 6/10
Album #1: Our Lady Peace - Burn Burn
Huh? This band is still making music? I mean, sure...Clumsy is one of the best alt-rock albums of the 90's and happiness... and gravity were pretty good albums...but do these guys really need to keep making music? And i don't mean that negatively...but when every one of your albums since clumsy has sounded almost exactly the same and you couldnt tell one song from the next if you put their discography on shuffle...they still aren't a bad band...i mean sure all their songs sound the same...but it's not a bad sound. Really, i don't want to knock this album, and i'm sure i'll like it more after a few more listens like i did with gravity, but after their last album flopped wouldn't you think these guys would give it up and move on to something else?
Comments/Complaints: It's certainly not a bad album, although, it sounds like every other album they've done since clumsy.
My Ranking: 6/10
Album #2: Arsonists Get All The Girls - Portals
Okay, so i get it...the whole...genre bending thing is fun and cool and stuff...and i get it, breakdowns are awesome and "br00tal" and whatnot. With that being said, this is a pretty good cd, i mean it's nothing original or life-enriching or anything but it's a fun listen...it's got a few decent headbanging parts and some pretty cool btbamesque "wtf?" parts...really these guys are like between the buried and me but with less grating vocals and a better guitar sound and alot less creativity. The bonus track at the end is pretty funny though...for the most part.
Comments/Complaints: I kind of feel like a 12 year old girl with purple skinny jeans, brightly colored nike high tops, a pink, neon green, neon blue, bright yellow, and turquoise devil wears prada shirt and 3Oh3! on my list of favorite bands ever when i listen to this album.
My Ranking: 6.5/10
Okay, so i get it...the whole...genre bending thing is fun and cool and stuff...and i get it, breakdowns are awesome and "br00tal" and whatnot. With that being said, this is a pretty good cd, i mean it's nothing original or life-enriching or anything but it's a fun listen...it's got a few decent headbanging parts and some pretty cool btbamesque "wtf?" parts...really these guys are like between the buried and me but with less grating vocals and a better guitar sound and alot less creativity. The bonus track at the end is pretty funny though...for the most part.
Comments/Complaints: I kind of feel like a 12 year old girl with purple skinny jeans, brightly colored nike high tops, a pink, neon green, neon blue, bright yellow, and turquoise devil wears prada shirt and 3Oh3! on my list of favorite bands ever when i listen to this album.
My Ranking: 6.5/10
Album # 3: Rx Bandits - Mandala
FINALLY! An album that actually sets itself apart from the other bands in it's genre...mostly because they span multiple genres, but not in the annoying way, but in the...punk band with pop punk, reggae, ska, and prog rock influences kind of way. When i first heard their last album that i randomly picked up because it looked and sounded cool i was HOOKED on this band...their singers voice is gorgeous and it fits the music so well. Although, i am disappointed at the lack of horns and whatnot on this album i do think it's rather cool that they can keep the same reggae, ska, pop punk vibe with just pure talent alone, so touche' to them for being able to craft a beautiful album despite missing the one element that got me into them in the first place. Also, the intro to "Hope is a butterfly..." is very fall of troyian in nature...but not in the gay way, but in a cool way. This band just simply rules!
Comments/Complaints: Not a boring song on the album. Very chilled and happy and summer time worthy!
My Ranking: 8.5/10
FINALLY! An album that actually sets itself apart from the other bands in it's genre...mostly because they span multiple genres, but not in the annoying way, but in the...punk band with pop punk, reggae, ska, and prog rock influences kind of way. When i first heard their last album that i randomly picked up because it looked and sounded cool i was HOOKED on this band...their singers voice is gorgeous and it fits the music so well. Although, i am disappointed at the lack of horns and whatnot on this album i do think it's rather cool that they can keep the same reggae, ska, pop punk vibe with just pure talent alone, so touche' to them for being able to craft a beautiful album despite missing the one element that got me into them in the first place. Also, the intro to "Hope is a butterfly..." is very fall of troyian in nature...but not in the gay way, but in a cool way. This band just simply rules!
Comments/Complaints: Not a boring song on the album. Very chilled and happy and summer time worthy!
My Ranking: 8.5/10
Album #4: Set Your Goals - This Will Be The Death Of Us
Okay, so here's how i'm going to do this review. I'm going to start from track 1 listening to this album and talk about the songs track by track, if i can make it through every song without getting annoyed it gets a good review, and if it becomes boring/generic/bland/lame then i'm going to turn it off immediately and give it a N/A
Track 1: Starts out good enough, cool drum intro and bass line. Oh, here comes a pretty cool punk rock riff with a very epic vibe to it...okay so i'm feeling it. Okay, so now there is some clean vocals over a pretty cool riff...but i love this whole pop/hardcore punk vibe so i'm not hating it. The second singer sounds better than the first...much less annoying. Song passes.
Track 2: Starts out with a New Found Gloryesque intro, nice sample that bleeds into static...wait it just skipped to track 3
Track 3: Continuation of where track 2 left off with the new found gloryesque pop punk riffs going. But not in a bad way...i kind of like the dual vocal style! It keeps them from getting annoying.
Okay, so i've realized all the songs on here sound alike, not really in a bad way...but in a "i've got enough ammo to give it my full opinion" kind of way. Basically these guys have a very blink 182/new found glory pop punk vibe, but i'm a sucker for that kind of stuff. It's not really anything special, but it's definitely not a stinker.
Comments/Complaints: These guys are pretty good and stuff, but i think the new New Found Glory album is done better, but that's like saying the new Slayer is better than the new Warbringer...of course it is!...because it's their sound...the other band is just adding their take to it.
My Ranking: 6.75/10
Album #5: Valhall - Red Planet
Okay, so here's how i'm going to do this review. I'm going to start from track 1 listening to this album and talk about the songs track by track, if i can make it through every song without getting annoyed it gets a good review, and if it becomes boring/generic/bland/lame then i'm going to turn it off immediately and give it a N/A
Track 1: Starts out good enough, cool drum intro and bass line. Oh, here comes a pretty cool punk rock riff with a very epic vibe to it...okay so i'm feeling it. Okay, so now there is some clean vocals over a pretty cool riff...but i love this whole pop/hardcore punk vibe so i'm not hating it. The second singer sounds better than the first...much less annoying. Song passes.
Track 2: Starts out with a New Found Gloryesque intro, nice sample that bleeds into static...wait it just skipped to track 3
Track 3: Continuation of where track 2 left off with the new found gloryesque pop punk riffs going. But not in a bad way...i kind of like the dual vocal style! It keeps them from getting annoying.
Okay, so i've realized all the songs on here sound alike, not really in a bad way...but in a "i've got enough ammo to give it my full opinion" kind of way. Basically these guys have a very blink 182/new found glory pop punk vibe, but i'm a sucker for that kind of stuff. It's not really anything special, but it's definitely not a stinker.
Comments/Complaints: These guys are pretty good and stuff, but i think the new New Found Glory album is done better, but that's like saying the new Slayer is better than the new Warbringer...of course it is!...because it's their sound...the other band is just adding their take to it.
My Ranking: 6.75/10
Album #5: Valhall - Red Planet
Oh man, there is nothing i love more than a dirty, rotten, down-tuned, doomy as hell stoner rock album. This band has apparently been around for a quite a while and features Fenriz from Darkthrone on drums which is pretty cool, also they are on Phil Anselmo's label Housecore Records, which was good enough reason for me to give them a listen. As far as doomy stoner rock goes this album has the typical cast of characters...but something about it just seems genuine. I mean you actually feel a bit of their soul coming out of the riffs and it is a very dirty, tarred and feathered, baked 24/7 monster of a soul...which...i guess if you're playing stoner rock is kind of the vibe you need to give off...so touche'!
Comments/Complaints: Nothing special, however, if you're driving on a motorcycle with a leather jacket and a darkthrone sticker on your bike and rapidly approaching an empty tank with no gas station for miles and one doobie in your jacket pocket...this is the album for you!
My Ranking: 7/10
Album #6: Red Fang - Red Fang
Now this is what i'm talkin about! Another dirty scummy punk/rock album. These guys play a very dirty kind of rock n' roll. The kind that makes you feel like riding in a fast car or on a motorcycle and going out in the middle of nowhere and drink and adult beverage or twenty and reflect on life. There is a decidedly kyuss/qotsa vibe going on in this song, but not an obvious one...it's just kind of coincidental...there is alot of creativity going on from this band though. This is such a raw album...It's just full of big dirty creative bouncy qotsaesque riffs...there is a very good reason these guys opened a tour for clutch, they are very clutchesque in nature as well which is pretty cool.
Comments/Complaints: If you like Clutch, Qotsa, Viking Skull, Black Sabbath, or Kyuss then you'll love this band!
My Ranking: 8/10
Now this is what i'm talkin about! Another dirty scummy punk/rock album. These guys play a very dirty kind of rock n' roll. The kind that makes you feel like riding in a fast car or on a motorcycle and going out in the middle of nowhere and drink and adult beverage or twenty and reflect on life. There is a decidedly kyuss/qotsa vibe going on in this song, but not an obvious one...it's just kind of coincidental...there is alot of creativity going on from this band though. This is such a raw album...It's just full of big dirty creative bouncy qotsaesque riffs...there is a very good reason these guys opened a tour for clutch, they are very clutchesque in nature as well which is pretty cool.
Comments/Complaints: If you like Clutch, Qotsa, Viking Skull, Black Sabbath, or Kyuss then you'll love this band!
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #7: Project 86 - Picket Fence Cartel
First of all, let me say that there are two kinds of people that are going to review a Project 86 album; the fanboy that's been listening to them forever and still cares about what they have to say, and the pretentious death metal guy that writes for decibel that gets a kick out of putting them down...also you may see the guy in an avenged sevenfold, or slipknot shirt at revolver review it and put it down because he doesnt get it.
Now me, i am a P86 fanboy and have been since '00 when Drawing Black Lines came out. And at last count i am only missing 2 P86 cd's from my collection of bought albums. These guys just have a sound unlike any other band out there...whether they be christian or secular. It just so happens that they are christians who have overcome quite a bit of adversity over the years and still maintained a good artistic vision and a will to tweak their sound ever so slightly on every album to give it that same P86 vibe but with a different twist. It lacks the big riffs of drawing black lines, but it has alot of their signature catchy as hell vocal hooks with alot of really cool riffs and their recently added electronic sound that just makes their music sound that much better. Also, i'm hearing a very thrashy influence on this album, even a few riffs that are semi reminiscent of slayer!
Comments/Complaints: Another solid release by P86 and it keeps them once again head and shoulders above the other bands on solid state that sound like garbage like august burns red, demon hunter, advent, oh sleeper, and...well every other band on that label currently besides Living Sacrifice, norma jean, underoath, and the showdown
My Ranking: 8.5/10
First of all, let me say that there are two kinds of people that are going to review a Project 86 album; the fanboy that's been listening to them forever and still cares about what they have to say, and the pretentious death metal guy that writes for decibel that gets a kick out of putting them down...also you may see the guy in an avenged sevenfold, or slipknot shirt at revolver review it and put it down because he doesnt get it.
Now me, i am a P86 fanboy and have been since '00 when Drawing Black Lines came out. And at last count i am only missing 2 P86 cd's from my collection of bought albums. These guys just have a sound unlike any other band out there...whether they be christian or secular. It just so happens that they are christians who have overcome quite a bit of adversity over the years and still maintained a good artistic vision and a will to tweak their sound ever so slightly on every album to give it that same P86 vibe but with a different twist. It lacks the big riffs of drawing black lines, but it has alot of their signature catchy as hell vocal hooks with alot of really cool riffs and their recently added electronic sound that just makes their music sound that much better. Also, i'm hearing a very thrashy influence on this album, even a few riffs that are semi reminiscent of slayer!
Comments/Complaints: Another solid release by P86 and it keeps them once again head and shoulders above the other bands on solid state that sound like garbage like august burns red, demon hunter, advent, oh sleeper, and...well every other band on that label currently besides Living Sacrifice, norma jean, underoath, and the showdown
My Ranking: 8.5/10
Album #8: Kamchatka - III
This band is one that i've heard of but didnt feel inspired to listen to until a friend of mine one night seemed incredibly shocked that i had not heard them and scribbled their name down on a napkin and insisted that they would blow my mind. Well, after hearing their album that they actually released in march i have to say...my mind is not entirely blown...but it is a pretty good album. I'm sure their older stuff is better because most bands like this usually get worse with age, but there are alot of really cool catchy guitar hooks and the vocalist is obviously swedish, which explains A: the awesome grooves behind him and B: his obviously heavy swedish accent that adds an interesting touch to the vocal hooks. There are alot of very heavy but poppy riffs on this album, and it has an awesome vibe to it, but it gets kind of old after awhile. I mean, you can only hear heavy, groovy riffs with the same vocal stylings over and over so many times before it gets kind of old...but that doesnt mean it's not good, it just means they fail the A.D.D. test like so many other bands before them, and to come.
Comments/Complaints: Good album, well written, lots of groovy guitar riffs and whatnot, but a failure to hold my attention for more than 4 or 5 songs. After track 5 i was already thinking "jeez, theres still 6 songs left?!?!?
My Ranking: 7/10
Monday, July 13, 2009
Desert Island Discs: Live Albums
I am a huge fan of live albums personally...as long as it brings something different to the table than the actual albums of course...
Now some are better than others. Like, Frampton comes alive is cool...but i'm not a big frampton fan, and then other bands put out live albums that bring nothing to the table and sound exactly like the studio version...just in crappier quality...so it takes at least a little bit of effort to make me enjoy a live album or even a live bootleg.
here is a rough list of my favorite live albums in no particular order
Pantera - Official Live: 100 Proof:
Pantera, released this album while touring from great southern trendkill and you can tell because it is made very fast, very nasty, and incredibly heavy, and full of phil's incredible banter.
Slayer - Decade Of Aggression:
This album is slayers only greatest hits album really.
Rage Against The Machine - Live At The Grand Olympic Auditorium:
The only thing sadder than listening to this knowing it was their last performance ever is the money-grubbing reunion run they've been doing.
Deep Purple - Made In Japan:
Full of fury and power and awesome rock n' roll...one of the first live albums ever made and definitely one of the best.
Thin Lizzy - Live and Dangerous:
Incredibly loud and full of so many awesome riffs and definitely a great introduction to the band.
The Allman Brothers Band - Live At The Fillmore East:
There is no other band in the world except maybe Dream Theater or Phish that could pull this off...33 minute songs full of improvisational soloing and more heart and emotion than a mandy moore movie.
Metallica - World Magnetic Tour - Little Rock, Ar 11-22-09:
Not an official live album...but it is the set that i saw them play live and it ruled tremendously!
Iron Maiden - Live After Death: Such an epic album that completely changes the way you hear all the songs on album.
Ozzy Osbourne - Live At Budokan:
This album puts on display all of Ozzy's best material being played by Zakk Wylde, Mike Borden, and Rob Trujillo, needless to say it rules.
Megadeth - That One Night Live In Buenos Aires:
Not only was Dave Mustaine at the top of his game, but so was the crowd and it's so awesome hearing them sing the guitar riffs back and letting out chants that add a whole new dimension to the songs.
Queens Of The Stone Age - Over The Years And Through The Woods:
Awesome mostly because of this "hey you, turn up the lights dan, this guy in the long sleeve shirt, everybody look at this guy in the white long sleeve shirt...see him? i'm pointin' at him this guy is a total c*cksmoker arent you? your a c*cksmoker arent you? he's throwin sh*t at me! i've tried to come here 5 times and he's throwin sh*t at me. now it's not just me and you that knows your a f*cking a**hole it's everybody, so when you see mr c*cksmoker later, just walk by and say hey c*cksmoker eat a bag of d*cks! it's been nice having you here you c*cksmoking a**hole! i wanna have fun man! i wanna get drunk! i wanna get laid! i wanna do cool sh*t! are you with me? this is the anti-c*cksmoker song!"
The music rules also.
Motorhead - No Sleep Til Hammersmith:
One word describes this perfectly "LLLLLOOOOOOUUUUUUDDDDDD"
Fu Manchu - Go For It Live:
These guys have such a great live show and this album is just chock full of big dirty riffs and awesome crowd interaction.
Led Zeppelin - How The West Was Won:
This 3 disc set properly displays how Led Zeppelin musically burned down the entire state of california.
Jimi Hendrix - Band Of Gypsys:
Now most people would say hendrix live at woodstock is their fave...but i like this one better because the lineup is much more steady and bluesy and dirty and awesome and "machine gun" and "them changes" are the best songs ever...
Now some are better than others. Like, Frampton comes alive is cool...but i'm not a big frampton fan, and then other bands put out live albums that bring nothing to the table and sound exactly like the studio version...just in crappier quality...so it takes at least a little bit of effort to make me enjoy a live album or even a live bootleg.
here is a rough list of my favorite live albums in no particular order
Pantera - Official Live: 100 Proof:
Pantera, released this album while touring from great southern trendkill and you can tell because it is made very fast, very nasty, and incredibly heavy, and full of phil's incredible banter.
Slayer - Decade Of Aggression:
This album is slayers only greatest hits album really.
Rage Against The Machine - Live At The Grand Olympic Auditorium:
The only thing sadder than listening to this knowing it was their last performance ever is the money-grubbing reunion run they've been doing.
Deep Purple - Made In Japan:
Full of fury and power and awesome rock n' roll...one of the first live albums ever made and definitely one of the best.
Thin Lizzy - Live and Dangerous:
Incredibly loud and full of so many awesome riffs and definitely a great introduction to the band.
The Allman Brothers Band - Live At The Fillmore East:
There is no other band in the world except maybe Dream Theater or Phish that could pull this off...33 minute songs full of improvisational soloing and more heart and emotion than a mandy moore movie.
Metallica - World Magnetic Tour - Little Rock, Ar 11-22-09:
Not an official live album...but it is the set that i saw them play live and it ruled tremendously!
Iron Maiden - Live After Death: Such an epic album that completely changes the way you hear all the songs on album.
Ozzy Osbourne - Live At Budokan:
This album puts on display all of Ozzy's best material being played by Zakk Wylde, Mike Borden, and Rob Trujillo, needless to say it rules.
Megadeth - That One Night Live In Buenos Aires:
Not only was Dave Mustaine at the top of his game, but so was the crowd and it's so awesome hearing them sing the guitar riffs back and letting out chants that add a whole new dimension to the songs.
Queens Of The Stone Age - Over The Years And Through The Woods:
Awesome mostly because of this "hey you, turn up the lights dan, this guy in the long sleeve shirt, everybody look at this guy in the white long sleeve shirt...see him? i'm pointin' at him this guy is a total c*cksmoker arent you? your a c*cksmoker arent you? he's throwin sh*t at me! i've tried to come here 5 times and he's throwin sh*t at me. now it's not just me and you that knows your a f*cking a**hole it's everybody, so when you see mr c*cksmoker later, just walk by and say hey c*cksmoker eat a bag of d*cks! it's been nice having you here you c*cksmoking a**hole! i wanna have fun man! i wanna get drunk! i wanna get laid! i wanna do cool sh*t! are you with me? this is the anti-c*cksmoker song!"
The music rules also.
Motorhead - No Sleep Til Hammersmith:
One word describes this perfectly "LLLLLOOOOOOUUUUUUDDDDDD"
Fu Manchu - Go For It Live:
These guys have such a great live show and this album is just chock full of big dirty riffs and awesome crowd interaction.
Led Zeppelin - How The West Was Won:
This 3 disc set properly displays how Led Zeppelin musically burned down the entire state of california.
Jimi Hendrix - Band Of Gypsys:
Now most people would say hendrix live at woodstock is their fave...but i like this one better because the lineup is much more steady and bluesy and dirty and awesome and "machine gun" and "them changes" are the best songs ever...
Saturday, July 11, 2009
Low Fidelity 7-10-09
So i woke up today with Amber next to me and that was awesome...however it was at 8:30am and i had to go to work which was absolutely gay as hell...but i did get to see her one last time at the mall before i went into work.
Once i got there the store was dead...and it stayed dead as a doornail until about noon or so...and it didnt get busy until about 1:30 which is awesome because i got off at 3.
I expected today to be nuts...and for the most part it was pretty tame except the fact that i found a stolen raconteurs cd and a stolen incubus cd which was gay...then my manager was walking in and saw a little kid standing next to his mom stealing a michael jackson cd...when he went up and said something she screamed his name and then slapped him in the mouth and drag him out of the store rapidly.
I always love the random stuff that i see at work though...like today there was this really pretty girl in flip flops walking real fast and she started looking at me and smiled and then BOOM! she tripped over her feet and did the "oh crap i'm gonna fall" bent over recovery type maneuver people pull and managed to keep herself up and then she looked back at me trying not to laugh and gave me the "holy crap that guy just saw me almost bite it...i'm so embarrassed!" look...it was pretty funny.
Outside of that the only other random things i noticed was a pregnant woman that was almost a midget and a group of black guys wearing slipknot shirts who walked into the store and one of them had a game stop bag that made the "i'm sorry, we forgot to demagnetize your bag or you're a dirty thief" alarm thingy go off...and instead of bein cool and bringing the bag to me at the counter they looked at me and said "we just walked in? what's the deal? do you think we stole something or something?" and i told him to bring the bag to me and when i went to demagnetize it the token fat white guy in the group who thinks he's cool by being overtly loud and saying dumb things that he thinks are funny goes up to me and says "is there a problem here?" all cool and tough guy like and then i demagnetized the bag and they all seemed to be relieved...it was the dumbest thing ever.
Oh, and we listened to nothing but the new Daughtry album today which as i'm sure you can guess...was f*cking torture.
Other than that today was cool and i have no awesome stories which is kind of a bummer.
The Kills are a really really good band!
Once i got there the store was dead...and it stayed dead as a doornail until about noon or so...and it didnt get busy until about 1:30 which is awesome because i got off at 3.
I expected today to be nuts...and for the most part it was pretty tame except the fact that i found a stolen raconteurs cd and a stolen incubus cd which was gay...then my manager was walking in and saw a little kid standing next to his mom stealing a michael jackson cd...when he went up and said something she screamed his name and then slapped him in the mouth and drag him out of the store rapidly.
I always love the random stuff that i see at work though...like today there was this really pretty girl in flip flops walking real fast and she started looking at me and smiled and then BOOM! she tripped over her feet and did the "oh crap i'm gonna fall" bent over recovery type maneuver people pull and managed to keep herself up and then she looked back at me trying not to laugh and gave me the "holy crap that guy just saw me almost bite it...i'm so embarrassed!" look...it was pretty funny.
Outside of that the only other random things i noticed was a pregnant woman that was almost a midget and a group of black guys wearing slipknot shirts who walked into the store and one of them had a game stop bag that made the "i'm sorry, we forgot to demagnetize your bag or you're a dirty thief" alarm thingy go off...and instead of bein cool and bringing the bag to me at the counter they looked at me and said "we just walked in? what's the deal? do you think we stole something or something?" and i told him to bring the bag to me and when i went to demagnetize it the token fat white guy in the group who thinks he's cool by being overtly loud and saying dumb things that he thinks are funny goes up to me and says "is there a problem here?" all cool and tough guy like and then i demagnetized the bag and they all seemed to be relieved...it was the dumbest thing ever.
Oh, and we listened to nothing but the new Daughtry album today which as i'm sure you can guess...was f*cking torture.
Other than that today was cool and i have no awesome stories which is kind of a bummer.
The Kills are a really really good band!
Thursday, July 9, 2009
Mini Music Reviews (Stuff that's been rocking my world lately)
First of all i'd like to say that i'm tired of just reviewing new albums so i'm going to be including reviews to older stuff i've been listening to lately...well...eventually...this one is all new albums though haha.
Album #1
The Dead Weather - Horehound
Man, oh man! I've been anticipating this album ever since the very second i read about it possibly happening!
Dean Fertita is a freaking GENIUS as making noises...wether it be with his guitar or other instruments...he is queens of the stone age's secret weapon...and a definite force to be reckoned with in The Dead Weather. "Hang you from the heavens" is a super sweet single and would be in heavy rotation if i had my own radio station. "Treat me like your mother" is full of sexy awesome dirty rock riffs.
Basically...this album is full of unique noises, sick rock n' roll groove, awesome songs, incredible talent, and absolutely soul shattering happiness!
Comments/Complaints: No complaints except that it took too long to come out...this album is by far one of the most beautiful pieces of rock n' roll created ever...no doubt
My ranking: 11/10
Album #2
Nebula - Heavy Psych
This band is formed from past members of Fu Manchu...and it sort of shows...but it's more psychadelic in nature and less desert rock...however it does have some sweet rock n' roll moments. These guys havent put out an album in seemingly forever so new music from desert rock icons is always fun!
Comments/Complaints: no complaints really...this is a heavy psychadelic bluesy desert rock album
My Ranking: 8.5/10
Album #3
Dysrhythmia - Psychic Maps
Dysrhythmia makes super heavy instrumental metal that i've become very fond of...really i'm fond of everything Colin Marston makes...behold...the arctopus, krallice, and this band are all incredibly awesome projects of his. At times this album reminds me of something Converge, or the old version of Dillinger Escape Plan would write and it totally rules! Plus this album was made with the thought in mind that it's really heavy instrumental music that gets boring if played too long, so the album is very heavy and has alot of awesome moments...but it ends before you get bored! Which is awesome! I love it when a band makes a really good album...with a really good statement, that doesnt overstay it's welcome!
Comments/Complaints: CAN'T WAIT FOR NEW BEHOLD...THE ARCTOPUS ALBUM!
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #4
Revolution Mother - Rollin' With Tha Mutha'
"LIVEEEE! I'M GONNA FLY HIGH! I'M GONNA LIVE FAST! I'M GONNA RIDE THE SKYYY!!" The minute i heard those words uttered over some of the filthiest southern rock/thrashy skate punk riffs i've ever heard while the song played during a great scene in "The Hangover" i KNEW i had to listen to whatever band it was; so i stayed to the end credits and saw it was Revolution Mother and instantly, i remembered seeing them at warped 07 and being blown away and then i looked the song up later that day and found out they are on ferret records now and have a new album droppings so i instantly built up anticipation.
On saturday July 4th at roughly 10:35 am i got this album in my hot little hands and havent stopped obsessing over it yet.
Basically, Revolution Mother plays hard, fast, dirty, filthy, groovy, thrashy hard rock with a decidedly skate punk vibe. All the songs have a big fat groove and more than a few memorable riffs and even some very entertaining although quite cheesy lyrics.
This album is the soundtrack to the life of anyone who has drank a bottle of whiskey while riding a harley naked through the desert on their way to destroy all involved members of the rival gang that killed their dad.
Comments/Complaints: awesome awesome awesome AWESOME!
My Ranking: 10,000 decibels/10
Album #5
Mount Eerie - Wind's Poem
Phil Elverum is a genius....plain and simple. Never have i EVER witnessed a more entertaining spectacle than watching this guy sit with his legs indian crossed and barefoot on a stage in a random gym looking room at tech and play through a dirty, beaten up, awesome SunnO))) amp with his guitar and emit this ridiculously heavy music in the simplest form. Basically it's metal for indie kids who are too cool to listen to slayer and neurosis...now it's not really metal though...more like, ambient, noisy, heavy, doomy, beautiful indie music.
It's got alot of jesuesque atmosphere and a very low-fi black metal vibe and times, and alot of beautiful noises emitting from it...not to mention phil elverum has an incredible voice.
Comments/Complaints: this is a great album to listen to at midnight with a lit candle and a glow in the dark immortal poster on your wall while sipping on hot tea and pondering your life
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #6 Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
I used to HATE HATE this band...mostly because a friend of mine would play them at all the wrong times when weird noisy indie wasn't my preferred genre of the moment...however after hearing the new album by dirty projectors i must say that i am a fan. The music is very creative and obscure, and at times rockin and dancy which is pretty cool and they also take their very unique vocal stylings and go haywire. This album is really really really good but i've only heard it all the way through a couple of times so i really want to listen more and let it sink in because it's really good.
Comments/Complaints: Need to listen to it more to get the full gist of it. It's got alot of awesome creativity on it and it really hits all the perfect spots in my brain that make it repeatable and memorable
My Ranking: 9/10
Album # 7
Arabian Safari - Organ Donar
*Editors Note*
I am friends with the 2 guys that wrote this album, but in no way is this review even the slightest bit biased because it really is that good.
Matt Sigur and Paul Kintzing have finally put out an actual album under the arabian safari name and i say it's about time! These guys have amazing chemistry together as musicians as well as enough talent to really accentuate each others styles.
One thing i like about this album is that alot of the songs are short and to the point and have a very very good tone to them. Of course alot of the songs like "Slogan" have a very Dinosaur Jr/Sonic Youth vibe...but A: who can blame them B: how can that be bad? The vocals on that song sound very interpolish to me with a dinosaur jr guitar riff. The album has a very strange production sound to it because though it has a very rough production to it...that rawness actually makes the songs come off better because it keeps them from becoming over-polished and keeps them at a very noisy indie rock level which is cool. Also, the song "Song For Ringo" is awesome! And not even because it's named for me! It has a very very VERY cool Zombi-like guitar tone that gives it a cool "intro to a movie about a space shuttle launch" vibe.
Comments/Complaints: though the album was kind of rushed it seemed...it is by far some of the best material i've ever heard these 2 guys do together and it showcases both of their talent quite well and it finally gives 2 incredible young musicians a good quality demo that they can shop to record labels and music nerds to help them get going down their road of future musical domination!
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #8
Dream Theater - Black Clouds and Silver Linings
The last Dream Theater album was really really good...however it seems that they are so super talented that they just figured they needed to make the most technical and crazy album ever...and it made it hard to listen to completely...however with this new album they have done it perfectly! All of the songs tell a great story and instead of just jumping out of the box immediately with super heavy stuff they let the songs build so it leaves you waiting for something awesome to happen...and BOOM! the crazy drum fills and guitar solo's and keyboard solo's go crazy...but now it's only when necessary and they don't detract much from the actual songs which is pretty cool. This album may not get alot of good reviews from hardcore DT fans...but i love it and think that they hit their stride majorly with this album.
Comments/Complaints: lots of awesome dream theater wankery mixed with memorable lyrics and songs make for a great album
My Ranking: 9/10
Album #9
Between The Trees - Spain
A friend of mind recommended i check this band out a long time ago and i did and was impressed, however, i noticed one thing then that is even more strikingly obvious now.
The singer for Between the Trees sounds JUSTTTT LIKEEEE the turd that sings for the fray, who is a quite blatant rip off of jon foremand of switchfoot. But seriously, if you were to walk in a room where a song by this band is playing you would automatically either think it was the fray or switchfoot...now that's not saying that's a bad thing. One thing i like about this band is that it has all the happy awesome catchy piano rock vibes that you get from the fray...but it leaves you without all the feelings of guilt and regret and questioning your sexuality that you get when you listen to the fray...and for that i fully back this band! They are also awesome live.
Comments/Complaints: this band is a more indie centered version of the fray
My Ranking: 7/10
Album #10
August Burns Red - Constellations
This band and i have a rather sordid past with each other. See, i think all of the people that really really like them and wear their stupid shirts are all gay. Mainly because they are NOTHING spectacular in their genre and their music is a blatant rip off of other bands of the same genre but with less talent. With that said i'm going to avoid wasting my time 4 minutes at a time and just give the vibe i get from each song individually
Track 1: sounds like oceans between us era as i lay dying riffs but with a less talented singer
Track 2: oh, great...more blatant as i lay dying riffs
Track 3: more as i lay dying riffs.
Okay, you know what...i'm trying to find the merit in this...but this band is stupid and if you want to hear this album...but done in better quality just listen to An Ocean Between Us by As I Lay Dying because this album sounds exactly like that one...i mean EXACTLY LIKE IT! seriously...
Comments/Complaints: seriously, why in the hell do people like this band? In fact, if someone asks me for this album at the store i'm going to hand them the as i lay dying album instead.
My Ranking: N/A
Album #1
The Dead Weather - Horehound
Man, oh man! I've been anticipating this album ever since the very second i read about it possibly happening!
Dean Fertita is a freaking GENIUS as making noises...wether it be with his guitar or other instruments...he is queens of the stone age's secret weapon...and a definite force to be reckoned with in The Dead Weather. "Hang you from the heavens" is a super sweet single and would be in heavy rotation if i had my own radio station. "Treat me like your mother" is full of sexy awesome dirty rock riffs.
Basically...this album is full of unique noises, sick rock n' roll groove, awesome songs, incredible talent, and absolutely soul shattering happiness!
Comments/Complaints: No complaints except that it took too long to come out...this album is by far one of the most beautiful pieces of rock n' roll created ever...no doubt
My ranking: 11/10
Album #2
Nebula - Heavy Psych
This band is formed from past members of Fu Manchu...and it sort of shows...but it's more psychadelic in nature and less desert rock...however it does have some sweet rock n' roll moments. These guys havent put out an album in seemingly forever so new music from desert rock icons is always fun!
Comments/Complaints: no complaints really...this is a heavy psychadelic bluesy desert rock album
My Ranking: 8.5/10
Album #3
Dysrhythmia - Psychic Maps
Dysrhythmia makes super heavy instrumental metal that i've become very fond of...really i'm fond of everything Colin Marston makes...behold...the arctopus, krallice, and this band are all incredibly awesome projects of his. At times this album reminds me of something Converge, or the old version of Dillinger Escape Plan would write and it totally rules! Plus this album was made with the thought in mind that it's really heavy instrumental music that gets boring if played too long, so the album is very heavy and has alot of awesome moments...but it ends before you get bored! Which is awesome! I love it when a band makes a really good album...with a really good statement, that doesnt overstay it's welcome!
Comments/Complaints: CAN'T WAIT FOR NEW BEHOLD...THE ARCTOPUS ALBUM!
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #4
Revolution Mother - Rollin' With Tha Mutha'
"LIVEEEE! I'M GONNA FLY HIGH! I'M GONNA LIVE FAST! I'M GONNA RIDE THE SKYYY!!" The minute i heard those words uttered over some of the filthiest southern rock/thrashy skate punk riffs i've ever heard while the song played during a great scene in "The Hangover" i KNEW i had to listen to whatever band it was; so i stayed to the end credits and saw it was Revolution Mother and instantly, i remembered seeing them at warped 07 and being blown away and then i looked the song up later that day and found out they are on ferret records now and have a new album droppings so i instantly built up anticipation.
On saturday July 4th at roughly 10:35 am i got this album in my hot little hands and havent stopped obsessing over it yet.
Basically, Revolution Mother plays hard, fast, dirty, filthy, groovy, thrashy hard rock with a decidedly skate punk vibe. All the songs have a big fat groove and more than a few memorable riffs and even some very entertaining although quite cheesy lyrics.
This album is the soundtrack to the life of anyone who has drank a bottle of whiskey while riding a harley naked through the desert on their way to destroy all involved members of the rival gang that killed their dad.
Comments/Complaints: awesome awesome awesome AWESOME!
My Ranking: 10,000 decibels/10
Album #5
Mount Eerie - Wind's Poem
Phil Elverum is a genius....plain and simple. Never have i EVER witnessed a more entertaining spectacle than watching this guy sit with his legs indian crossed and barefoot on a stage in a random gym looking room at tech and play through a dirty, beaten up, awesome SunnO))) amp with his guitar and emit this ridiculously heavy music in the simplest form. Basically it's metal for indie kids who are too cool to listen to slayer and neurosis...now it's not really metal though...more like, ambient, noisy, heavy, doomy, beautiful indie music.
It's got alot of jesuesque atmosphere and a very low-fi black metal vibe and times, and alot of beautiful noises emitting from it...not to mention phil elverum has an incredible voice.
Comments/Complaints: this is a great album to listen to at midnight with a lit candle and a glow in the dark immortal poster on your wall while sipping on hot tea and pondering your life
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #6 Dirty Projectors - Bitte Orca
I used to HATE HATE this band...mostly because a friend of mine would play them at all the wrong times when weird noisy indie wasn't my preferred genre of the moment...however after hearing the new album by dirty projectors i must say that i am a fan. The music is very creative and obscure, and at times rockin and dancy which is pretty cool and they also take their very unique vocal stylings and go haywire. This album is really really really good but i've only heard it all the way through a couple of times so i really want to listen more and let it sink in because it's really good.
Comments/Complaints: Need to listen to it more to get the full gist of it. It's got alot of awesome creativity on it and it really hits all the perfect spots in my brain that make it repeatable and memorable
My Ranking: 9/10
Album # 7
Arabian Safari - Organ Donar
*Editors Note*
I am friends with the 2 guys that wrote this album, but in no way is this review even the slightest bit biased because it really is that good.
Matt Sigur and Paul Kintzing have finally put out an actual album under the arabian safari name and i say it's about time! These guys have amazing chemistry together as musicians as well as enough talent to really accentuate each others styles.
One thing i like about this album is that alot of the songs are short and to the point and have a very very good tone to them. Of course alot of the songs like "Slogan" have a very Dinosaur Jr/Sonic Youth vibe...but A: who can blame them B: how can that be bad? The vocals on that song sound very interpolish to me with a dinosaur jr guitar riff. The album has a very strange production sound to it because though it has a very rough production to it...that rawness actually makes the songs come off better because it keeps them from becoming over-polished and keeps them at a very noisy indie rock level which is cool. Also, the song "Song For Ringo" is awesome! And not even because it's named for me! It has a very very VERY cool Zombi-like guitar tone that gives it a cool "intro to a movie about a space shuttle launch" vibe.
Comments/Complaints: though the album was kind of rushed it seemed...it is by far some of the best material i've ever heard these 2 guys do together and it showcases both of their talent quite well and it finally gives 2 incredible young musicians a good quality demo that they can shop to record labels and music nerds to help them get going down their road of future musical domination!
My Ranking: 8/10
Album #8
Dream Theater - Black Clouds and Silver Linings
The last Dream Theater album was really really good...however it seems that they are so super talented that they just figured they needed to make the most technical and crazy album ever...and it made it hard to listen to completely...however with this new album they have done it perfectly! All of the songs tell a great story and instead of just jumping out of the box immediately with super heavy stuff they let the songs build so it leaves you waiting for something awesome to happen...and BOOM! the crazy drum fills and guitar solo's and keyboard solo's go crazy...but now it's only when necessary and they don't detract much from the actual songs which is pretty cool. This album may not get alot of good reviews from hardcore DT fans...but i love it and think that they hit their stride majorly with this album.
Comments/Complaints: lots of awesome dream theater wankery mixed with memorable lyrics and songs make for a great album
My Ranking: 9/10
Album #9
Between The Trees - Spain
A friend of mind recommended i check this band out a long time ago and i did and was impressed, however, i noticed one thing then that is even more strikingly obvious now.
The singer for Between the Trees sounds JUSTTTT LIKEEEE the turd that sings for the fray, who is a quite blatant rip off of jon foremand of switchfoot. But seriously, if you were to walk in a room where a song by this band is playing you would automatically either think it was the fray or switchfoot...now that's not saying that's a bad thing. One thing i like about this band is that it has all the happy awesome catchy piano rock vibes that you get from the fray...but it leaves you without all the feelings of guilt and regret and questioning your sexuality that you get when you listen to the fray...and for that i fully back this band! They are also awesome live.
Comments/Complaints: this band is a more indie centered version of the fray
My Ranking: 7/10
Album #10
August Burns Red - Constellations
This band and i have a rather sordid past with each other. See, i think all of the people that really really like them and wear their stupid shirts are all gay. Mainly because they are NOTHING spectacular in their genre and their music is a blatant rip off of other bands of the same genre but with less talent. With that said i'm going to avoid wasting my time 4 minutes at a time and just give the vibe i get from each song individually
Track 1: sounds like oceans between us era as i lay dying riffs but with a less talented singer
Track 2: oh, great...more blatant as i lay dying riffs
Track 3: more as i lay dying riffs.
Okay, you know what...i'm trying to find the merit in this...but this band is stupid and if you want to hear this album...but done in better quality just listen to An Ocean Between Us by As I Lay Dying because this album sounds exactly like that one...i mean EXACTLY LIKE IT! seriously...
Comments/Complaints: seriously, why in the hell do people like this band? In fact, if someone asks me for this album at the store i'm going to hand them the as i lay dying album instead.
My Ranking: N/A
Tuesday, July 7, 2009
Low Fidelity 7-5-09
Low Fidelity is a playful term that i used to describe my job, and
these are the things that occur while i'm at work that keep my brain
busy and confused.
-From July 5th 2009-
Yesterday was a pretty awesome day for the most part...today blows it out of the water heartily though!
Woke up at 11 and went and had lunch with dad which is always enjoyable...but more so this time because of the INCREDIBLE cast of characters that we encountered at grannys...there was this old man that looked like mr magoo that was talking to me about stuffing...and the little girl wondering around with an ice cream cone in her hand gazing at everyone/thing in wide wonder, and the creepy mean old man that said "WATCH IT!" as he walked by me while i was getting out of my chair...and the creepy black cook that said to me "dang yungsta...how big you is? you play football? how old you is?" and i told him how old i was and he looked at me with a look of "holy crap that young man is quite sizeable in stature for a man that age" and he said "oh...i figya'd you play football or some sh*t"
So i then began getting ready for work...which wasn't as annoying a process as i thought it would be today...then i got on the road and the roads were basically dead and my tape player was actually working!
Then i saw it...possibly the creepiest thing i've ever seen in a mall parking lot.
This older asian woman who was absolutely beautiful was standing by her car digging through her trunk...in a very short black dress...and the wind was blowing. So i know your thinking "but brandon, you're not creepy so of course you just walked in and smiled and treated her like a normal person right?" hehe...nope. I proceeded to sit in the car and wait for the inevitable...and BOOM! errr...WHOOSH it happened...a perfect gust of wind and up came the skirt...not a whole lot, but certainly enough to see her entire right butt cheek...which of course was covered in creepy spider veins and whatnot. Needless to say i walked towards the door and she gave me a very weirded out look like she knew what just happened so i gave her my paralyzing smile and said "how are you doin today? *grins like a turd*" and proceeded into work.
When i walked into work the store was pretty busy though and i spotted an awesome redneck couple that looked like they knew their way around a bottle of drano...
Then i decided to make note of all the random people and things i saw, because to go into as much detail as is necessary would take longer to type then i want, so here goes my list of notes i scribbled onto a piece of receipt paper to remember the events i was witnessing:
-god bless the girls that wear coochie cutters and no underwear who give you creepy looks when they see that you've noticed
-holy crap! coochie cutter is eating ice cream out of the same bowl with the same spoon as her hella douchey bf holding the lenny kravitz cd and his dumb friend and their incredibly creepy looking black friend!..more like AIDS CREAM!
-rofl @ the couple looking at anime porn together
-rofl @ this stupid daughtry song where he is using autotune...arent american idol people supposed to be able to sing without extra help?
-rofl @ a mexican askin me if we have "mumrika's" and being mad when i couldnt figure out he meant "memory cards"
-hahaha rofl @ icp dude with his hella funny pony tail and incredible fashion...he's wearing crocks and swimming shorts and a spiderman shirt and looking heartily at icp cd's
-so the creepy couple looking at porn that i thought were in their late 20's were actually both 18 and they just spent $60.00 worth of porn!
-rofl @ they guy saying "hay mayun...evrybodeh's gawt to have a hobby ryte?"
-more like "soulja boy suck em...and by em i mean dix...also more like "turn my fag on..."
-holy crap *insert name here* sure is wacked out of his mind on steroids...the dude was uncontrollably shaking and inexplicably bowed up...he looks like POPEYE!
-14 mexicans in the store at once!
-rofl @ the annoying wigger rednecks making an annoying slurping sound with their milkshake their sharing and buying a hollywood undead cd...
-wait...that's 2 instances of weird people sharing ice cream, and 2 hollywood undead cd's sold...
-mall cop has just made his way to the porn section...wonder if he buys anything
-NOW KING KONG BUNDY IS HERE AND HE'S LOOKING AT PORN TOO!
-PORN BATTTTTTTTTTTLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-these fellas have been plugging away at the porn section for some time now
-mall cop finishes first!
-mall cop just spent $28.37 and mentioned that he saw me lookin at the asian lady all creepy and admitted that he drove around in circles so he could get a better look as well and we both agreed what we saw was in fact awesome.
-mall cop is now our second porn purchaser of the day...until bundy steps up to the plate that is!
-bundy is inexplicably walking away with nothing and looking in rap now...
-wait...bundy is on his way back to the porn! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUNDY! BUNDY! BUNDY! YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! (i was standing at the counter cheering him on aloud)
-so king kong bundy just dropped $39.56 on porn! the best part is that he saved $6 cause of his membership card!
-unfortunately he didnt spend his usual $60 so he's only in 2nd place
-now the moley redneck is here to stake his claim to the title! that's 2 of my biggest porn buyers! now if creepy grandpa would show up my day would be complete
-moley redneck quickly drops $32 and claims 3rd place on the day
-today has been rather busy...way busier than a usual sunday
that's the main highlights i wrote down...the only other awesome things worth noting were:
-the guy with the indiana pacers tattoo
-the fat 10 year old redneck kid with a freakishly long mullet/rat tail and camouflage crocs
-rat tail boy's mom who has on a nickelback 2009 tour shirt and a blue dolphin tattoo on her leg
-the black guy with acne who asked if we had any ween cd's
and finally...
-the stuttering black guy with 2 hellacious children who bought 3 cd's and returned them and bought 3 different cd's because "dey wudn't tha wunz eye wunted"
Oh yeah, also i was walking through the metal section and noticed that lillian axe has a new album out and i was thinking to myself "i wonder if there's a person out there who is like...the world's biggest lillian axe fan ever...like with album cover tattoo's and stuff...
flash forward 3 hours
So i'm standing at a listening station listening to 30 second clips of the new dirty projectors album when all of a sudden walks in this big guy in a saints hat and i asked him if i could help him and he said "yeah man, i was wundrin if you could look up and see if ya'll have a new cd by lillian axe" and i thought "no f*ckin way!" so as i rang him up i just HAD to see if this was the guy...and sure enough it was! the dude had a lillian axe tattoo AND he was from nola so he's friends with both current members and ex members and has seen them live "at least 20 times" which is just so ironic that it's gorgeous...i did resist the urge to give him a hug and take pictures with him though even though i felt obligated to do at least one of the two.
these are the things that occur while i'm at work that keep my brain
busy and confused.
-From July 5th 2009-
Yesterday was a pretty awesome day for the most part...today blows it out of the water heartily though!
Woke up at 11 and went and had lunch with dad which is always enjoyable...but more so this time because of the INCREDIBLE cast of characters that we encountered at grannys...there was this old man that looked like mr magoo that was talking to me about stuffing...and the little girl wondering around with an ice cream cone in her hand gazing at everyone/thing in wide wonder, and the creepy mean old man that said "WATCH IT!" as he walked by me while i was getting out of my chair...and the creepy black cook that said to me "dang yungsta...how big you is? you play football? how old you is?" and i told him how old i was and he looked at me with a look of "holy crap that young man is quite sizeable in stature for a man that age" and he said "oh...i figya'd you play football or some sh*t"
So i then began getting ready for work...which wasn't as annoying a process as i thought it would be today...then i got on the road and the roads were basically dead and my tape player was actually working!
Then i saw it...possibly the creepiest thing i've ever seen in a mall parking lot.
This older asian woman who was absolutely beautiful was standing by her car digging through her trunk...in a very short black dress...and the wind was blowing. So i know your thinking "but brandon, you're not creepy so of course you just walked in and smiled and treated her like a normal person right?" hehe...nope. I proceeded to sit in the car and wait for the inevitable...and BOOM! errr...WHOOSH it happened...a perfect gust of wind and up came the skirt...not a whole lot, but certainly enough to see her entire right butt cheek...which of course was covered in creepy spider veins and whatnot. Needless to say i walked towards the door and she gave me a very weirded out look like she knew what just happened so i gave her my paralyzing smile and said "how are you doin today? *grins like a turd*" and proceeded into work.
When i walked into work the store was pretty busy though and i spotted an awesome redneck couple that looked like they knew their way around a bottle of drano...
Then i decided to make note of all the random people and things i saw, because to go into as much detail as is necessary would take longer to type then i want, so here goes my list of notes i scribbled onto a piece of receipt paper to remember the events i was witnessing:
-god bless the girls that wear coochie cutters and no underwear who give you creepy looks when they see that you've noticed
-holy crap! coochie cutter is eating ice cream out of the same bowl with the same spoon as her hella douchey bf holding the lenny kravitz cd and his dumb friend and their incredibly creepy looking black friend!..more like AIDS CREAM!
-rofl @ the couple looking at anime porn together
-rofl @ this stupid daughtry song where he is using autotune...arent american idol people supposed to be able to sing without extra help?
-rofl @ a mexican askin me if we have "mumrika's" and being mad when i couldnt figure out he meant "memory cards"
-hahaha rofl @ icp dude with his hella funny pony tail and incredible fashion...he's wearing crocks and swimming shorts and a spiderman shirt and looking heartily at icp cd's
-so the creepy couple looking at porn that i thought were in their late 20's were actually both 18 and they just spent $60.00 worth of porn!
-rofl @ they guy saying "hay mayun...evrybodeh's gawt to have a hobby ryte?"
-more like "soulja boy suck em...and by em i mean dix...also more like "turn my fag on..."
-holy crap *insert name here* sure is wacked out of his mind on steroids...the dude was uncontrollably shaking and inexplicably bowed up...he looks like POPEYE!
-14 mexicans in the store at once!
-rofl @ the annoying wigger rednecks making an annoying slurping sound with their milkshake their sharing and buying a hollywood undead cd...
-wait...that's 2 instances of weird people sharing ice cream, and 2 hollywood undead cd's sold...
-mall cop has just made his way to the porn section...wonder if he buys anything
-NOW KING KONG BUNDY IS HERE AND HE'S LOOKING AT PORN TOO!
-PORN BATTTTTTTTTTTLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
-these fellas have been plugging away at the porn section for some time now
-mall cop finishes first!
-mall cop just spent $28.37 and mentioned that he saw me lookin at the asian lady all creepy and admitted that he drove around in circles so he could get a better look as well and we both agreed what we saw was in fact awesome.
-mall cop is now our second porn purchaser of the day...until bundy steps up to the plate that is!
-bundy is inexplicably walking away with nothing and looking in rap now...
-wait...bundy is on his way back to the porn! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUN-DY! BUNDY! BUNDY! BUNDY! YEAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! (i was standing at the counter cheering him on aloud)
-so king kong bundy just dropped $39.56 on porn! the best part is that he saved $6 cause of his membership card!
-unfortunately he didnt spend his usual $60 so he's only in 2nd place
-now the moley redneck is here to stake his claim to the title! that's 2 of my biggest porn buyers! now if creepy grandpa would show up my day would be complete
-moley redneck quickly drops $32 and claims 3rd place on the day
-today has been rather busy...way busier than a usual sunday
that's the main highlights i wrote down...the only other awesome things worth noting were:
-the guy with the indiana pacers tattoo
-the fat 10 year old redneck kid with a freakishly long mullet/rat tail and camouflage crocs
-rat tail boy's mom who has on a nickelback 2009 tour shirt and a blue dolphin tattoo on her leg
-the black guy with acne who asked if we had any ween cd's
and finally...
-the stuttering black guy with 2 hellacious children who bought 3 cd's and returned them and bought 3 different cd's because "dey wudn't tha wunz eye wunted"
Oh yeah, also i was walking through the metal section and noticed that lillian axe has a new album out and i was thinking to myself "i wonder if there's a person out there who is like...the world's biggest lillian axe fan ever...like with album cover tattoo's and stuff...
flash forward 3 hours
So i'm standing at a listening station listening to 30 second clips of the new dirty projectors album when all of a sudden walks in this big guy in a saints hat and i asked him if i could help him and he said "yeah man, i was wundrin if you could look up and see if ya'll have a new cd by lillian axe" and i thought "no f*ckin way!" so as i rang him up i just HAD to see if this was the guy...and sure enough it was! the dude had a lillian axe tattoo AND he was from nola so he's friends with both current members and ex members and has seen them live "at least 20 times" which is just so ironic that it's gorgeous...i did resist the urge to give him a hug and take pictures with him though even though i felt obligated to do at least one of the two.
Low Fidelity 7-4-09
Low Fidelity is a playful term that i used to describe my job, and these are the things that occur while i'm at work that keep my brain busy and confused.
-From July 4th 2009-
Today is america's birthday and so far i've woke up and celebrated by watching sportscenter with dad and eating a super hella delicious mcdonald's breakfast.
As per usual i wait until 30 minutes until i'm supposed to be at work before i shower and get ready but it didnt take too long today but this morning still started out pretty miserable like thursday but i knew today would be different.
When i got to work i was thrilled to see i was working with mike, which was awesome because we talked about dumb people and music for a bit and then i mentioned cd's that come out tuesday i was looking for like revolution mother and sure enough...just a few minutes after the store opened, while he was going through boxes of new stuff we got in the new revolution mother!!!!!! I have been stoked to get this album since the first moment i saw the hangover and ride the sky was playing in the background of an intense seen and i had to stay til the end of the credits to see who that song was and sure enough it was them...it also occurred to me that i saw them at warped tour one year and it was quite incredible.
The rest of the day at work flowed so smoothly...mostly because the mall was SUPER dead until about 12:30 when there were about as many people there as you may see on a thursday night...not a saturday afternoon...which was pretty cool actually. I listened to the new Bob Dylan cd a few times while the store was dead, but i finally buckled and put on the fye monthly mix with stuff i like on it like kings of leon, animal collective, incubus, silversun pickups, and 311...but it also has some hella gay stuff on it like lady gaga and soulja boy and eminem and other faggy po(o)p music.
Pretty much the rest of my day at the store was spent reading rolling stone and salivating over revolution mother and talking about movies and music with sean and mike which rules immensely...also there were lots of mexicans in there today...at least 8 of em came in at one time which was funny and stuff...but bad for the latin section...i feel sorry for that section because it gets destroyed at least every 20 minutes haha.
Then i came home and chilled with dad and then went and hung out with the family and spent the rest of my night listening to revolution mother and playing baseball which was really awesome.
All i can think about when i think about independence day is "AMERICAAAAAAAAA F*CK YEAH! COMIN AGAIN TO SAVE THE MUTHAF*CKIN DAY YEAHHHHHHHHHHH"
-From July 4th 2009-
Today is america's birthday and so far i've woke up and celebrated by watching sportscenter with dad and eating a super hella delicious mcdonald's breakfast.
As per usual i wait until 30 minutes until i'm supposed to be at work before i shower and get ready but it didnt take too long today but this morning still started out pretty miserable like thursday but i knew today would be different.
When i got to work i was thrilled to see i was working with mike, which was awesome because we talked about dumb people and music for a bit and then i mentioned cd's that come out tuesday i was looking for like revolution mother and sure enough...just a few minutes after the store opened, while he was going through boxes of new stuff we got in the new revolution mother!!!!!! I have been stoked to get this album since the first moment i saw the hangover and ride the sky was playing in the background of an intense seen and i had to stay til the end of the credits to see who that song was and sure enough it was them...it also occurred to me that i saw them at warped tour one year and it was quite incredible.
The rest of the day at work flowed so smoothly...mostly because the mall was SUPER dead until about 12:30 when there were about as many people there as you may see on a thursday night...not a saturday afternoon...which was pretty cool actually. I listened to the new Bob Dylan cd a few times while the store was dead, but i finally buckled and put on the fye monthly mix with stuff i like on it like kings of leon, animal collective, incubus, silversun pickups, and 311...but it also has some hella gay stuff on it like lady gaga and soulja boy and eminem and other faggy po(o)p music.
Pretty much the rest of my day at the store was spent reading rolling stone and salivating over revolution mother and talking about movies and music with sean and mike which rules immensely...also there were lots of mexicans in there today...at least 8 of em came in at one time which was funny and stuff...but bad for the latin section...i feel sorry for that section because it gets destroyed at least every 20 minutes haha.
Then i came home and chilled with dad and then went and hung out with the family and spent the rest of my night listening to revolution mother and playing baseball which was really awesome.
All i can think about when i think about independence day is "AMERICAAAAAAAAA F*CK YEAH! COMIN AGAIN TO SAVE THE MUTHAF*CKIN DAY YEAHHHHHHHHHHH"
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